Saturday, June 30, 2012



I’m Caliban and only mummy (Sycorax) knows when I was born – and therefore how old I am. I have a twin sister, Elaban. Me and Siss always stick together.

We are being enslaved and kept in a cave against are will. Our kind would normally live in tall trees with plenty of vines to swing up and down on. Mummy used to swing us up and down, sideways and across. But she was killed, brutally murdered, by that fiend Prospero. She challenged him but he tricked her. She thought it was a hand-to-hand combat but he didn’t tell her about his Magic Book or his Stupid Staff (he always goes on and on about how he got it from Ebay - ‘only 30 euros’ he says).

He’s also got a witch of a daughter who thinks she’s so gorgeous, but if she was one of us she would be thrown in a volcano! When she was 4 she would also go on and on about how a Prince will come and rescue her and her old man (old Prospero). She always ended up getting me and Elaban into trouble because she was so boring that we fell asleep only to be kicked and stung awake by Prospero. OOOH HOW WE HATE HIM!

Like I say, me and my Sis always stick together. We have to really, because we’re all we have left of our Mummy and our species. We are forced to feast upon fresh veg. AAARRRGGGHHH! It’s revolting and we would normally feast upon raw animal flesh - it’s delicious.                


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